This article was republished at the Good Men Project online men’s magazine. Follow this link to the article.
Time Suck– (n) Something that’s engrossing and addictive, but that keeps you from doing things that are actually important, like earning a living, or eating meals, or caring for your children. (from UrbanDictionary.com)
Is playing golf the best use of our spare time? (look what it did to Judge Smalls)
Perhaps the greatest challenge we all face in being both a good provider and a present father is that there never seems to be enough time in a day. Our jobs and careers demand our time; our kids need a lot of us, too. It is really hard to find the time.
It is also hard to find the energy necessary to be a great dad. Stress, time demands, etc all seem to rob us of energy, and prevent us from being relaxed and present.
To help us recharge and to get us into the better mental (and physical) states necessary to be a great provider and father, we need some time for our own activities. Time with friends, physical activities, reading, music, what have you. In the classic, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, Steven Covey referred to this as “sharpening the saw”- making sure we take enough breaks to recharge, so we don’t burn out and lose effectiveness in our roles over time. We dedicated dads need reminders to do this, because while we focus on taking care of others first, we also have to spend some time taking care of ourselves.
And this gets me to the point of this post (which is intended as the first of a series on time sucks to avoid). We need to do things for ourselves and recharge. However, these things also take up our most precious resource, time. Ideally, the best activities maximize our fun, relaxation and recharging, while minimizing the amount of time taken away from the rest of our lives.
And first on my hit list of “Time Sucks to Avoid” is GOLF.
I’ll admit this right off the top. I don’t get golf. Never have and never will.
But, according to my many friends who play golf, this is only because I am unaware of:
The challenge of trying to play well
The joy of hitting a perfect shot
The benefits of a relaxing day out and good exercise
Playing a game out in a beautiful setting
The opportunities for camaraderie and friendly banter (potential beer-fire benefits!)
The focus on hitting the ball, which clears your mind of your other work and family concerns
Frankly, I just see “a good walk spoiled”, a waste of valuable real estate, an opportunity to lose money on poorly considered side-bets, and an excuse for drinking at 11am (golf can also be really expensive and cause people to wear funny pants, but I fear I’m just piling on now). Seriously, though, it seems to me that golf gobbles up just too much time for the very real benefits it confers.
Can we get the same benefit from 90 minutes of tennis? A beer-fire?, A pick-up game of basketball? A Saturday softball league? A night out with the guys? A bike ride? Most of these options represent good exercise alternatives to golf, can be just as socially rewarding, and are less expensive. And better still- they don’t gobble up 5 hours of your weekend (not to mention time at the driving range and/or lessons each week, as well as all the money for lessons and equipment).
I suppose a quick round with friends on ocassional Saturdays is one thing, but multiple rounds, plus all of the extra practice time and expense seems excessive to me.
Maybe I’m being too harsh. And, of course, I could be wrong. After all, I’m a tremendous slouch, and I admittedly don’t get golf. (…but don’t get me started on the time-suckitude of watching golf on tv!)
Care to defend golf? Have any other “time sucks” to nominate? Let’s discuss in the comments section.